Can You Please Bring Dinner to My Party?

Have you ever been invited to someone's house and have them ask you to bring dinner?

No?

Well, as of this week, I have.

We have these friends that Hubby went to college with.  They're a lovely couple except that they're low talkers and the husband is a bit of a know-it-all.  Although, if you already know this about him, you sort of know what you're getting yourself into when hanging out with him and it's not that big of deal.  My only other complaint is that the husband can be a little socially, umm, retarded.

I'll tell you though, he's an engineer.  And as a woman who married an engineer and has A LOT of engineers walk in and out of her life, I am well aware that they can be a bit socially awkward.  Luckily, Hubby is on the lesser end of the socially awkward spectrum, but he sure has his moments.

Well, this guy falls a little further on the spectrum.  He's completely harmless and I get that. He's a little exhausting but I know plenty of people that I can say that for.

But then this week, he stole the cake.

He nicely invited us over to watch Hubby's college play a pretty big game that for a change was being nationally televised.  I accepted for us and made the mistake of asking if we should bring anything.

Before I get to what we were asked, let me tell you this.  This guy always makes very specific requests.  Hubby and I typically get a good laugh out of it.  One time, we asked this question and we were told to bring guacamole. Not, bring some dip or bring something to snack on before dinner.  It was "Stop and pick up some guacamole." Again, let me be clear.  He wasn't asking us to make some of my "famous guacamole that everyone just raves about" because a) that doesn't really exist--although I do make it and it is delicious and b) we received this request as we were walking out of the door.

So back to this time, I asked the question and his response was (paraphrased) "Wings would be nice. We're going to make that cheese dip that [Hubby] likes."

Umm, did he really just say "Bring dinner and we'll have one snack here that your husband likes but that you don't"?  I was stunned.  I was just asked to provide dinner for someone else's get together.

Something you should know about me. I love to host.  And I mean LOVE it.  Every reason there is to get everyone to my home, I will gladly do it.  I always cook enough for an army (true) and my Hubby always has enough to drink for an army.  I will have something of everything because my big [hosting] fear is that someone will leave my house hungry.  People ask me if they can bring anything when the come over but they always already know the answer. No, I'll have plenty of food.

The funny part is that this guy NEVER has enough food to feed half the amount of people that are at his house.  I guess his big [hosting] fear is to have leftovers.  I had already planned to have dinner before we went over and when Hubby asked why, he quickly agreed when I told him there was no chance they'd have enough food.

But then, I got the request. "Can you please bring dinner to my party?" Nuts. Just nuts.

Well, as an awesome host and a spiteful person, I refused to bring it.  I told him we were going to eat dinner before and I was just wondering if he wanted us to bring any game time snacks.  I never heard back from him. I'm sure there were some words spoken about me behind my back. OH WELL. They aren't the first and they won't be the last.

What Being a Grown Up Means

One of the ways I think my in-laws screwed up my husband (get used to hearing that) is that he's a grown man and he still does a lot of things that he's "supposed" to do but that he doesn't want to do. I think it's kind of bizarre although maybe this is just the way my parents screwed me up... Nah, it's definitely them.

 File photo. My husband (center) and In-Laws.

Not sure if you can tell, but seriously, my husband is HOT!

I was raised so that I would want to do things that I'm supposed to do.  Maybe this isn't true 100% of the time but doesn't that just make me human. I guess there are the occasions when I take the high road even though I don't want to but that's just good social skills.  Sometimes I don't do things that I'm supposed to do because I don't want to.  Here's the weird thing, the world keeps turning and the birds keep chirping.  Weird.  

So, last night, we watched The King's Speech. Not because he or I wanted to see it but because he thought he was supposed to see it.  It won the Academy Award for best picture last year--that's always a big one for him.  See, we're not exactly the intellectual type when it comes to our movie watching and we often do not like the movies that get all the critical acclaim.  Some of our favorite movies are Anchorman, Waiting, Bad Boys, and Iron Man.  That's not to say that we don't like our occasional heavy drama--The Departed is up their tied for my favorite movie of all time with Forrest Gump. It's more to say that we're not likely to go see some artsy-fartsy movie by choice.  But there we were watching this slow, dialogue-heavy movie (the cinematography was incredible. The photographer inside me found it distracting).  Now it wasn't bad. In fact, I have a mini-crush on the royal family, so I was definitely more interested when I realized it was about Queen Elizabeth's father.  But still, I could have been happy the rest of my life having never seen it.

Internet Photo. This is a still from The King's Speech.

This is how the movie was shot.

The whole movie could have been still after still and then you watch the movie with a flip book.

Beautiful photography. I found it distracting in a movie.

Now this doesn't just happen with movies.  If that was all, it wouldn't be a topic worth typing about now would it?  The big one is with food.  Yes, I am chubby.  But my husband is a skinny twig with poor self-image issues (I assume just another way my in-laws screwed him up. Because as you've read, my self-image issues are most certainly attributed to my parents).  Folks, the truth is I live with a Food Nazi.

My husband one time brought home Brussels sprouts from the super market when I left the side dishes up to him.  I don't like Brussels sprouts. He doesn't like Brussels sprouts. He said we're supposed to eat them because they're good for us.  Let me take a moment to point out that I eat a lot of vegetables.  These were not brought home in place of some non-balanced meal that we would have otherwise eaten.  No, he brought them home because we're supposed to eat them.

We're also not supposed to eat non-breakfast foods for breakfast.  Some days I don't feel like eating breakfast food. I was never a big fan of waffles or pancakes.  Once in a while, I can go for some eggs. I usually eat cereal. But some mornings, I don't want any of that. So I'll eat some left overs from dinner the night before or a Lean Cuisine. This is not allowed when the husband is home. Side note: Breakfast food can be eaten at any time of the day.

One time when I was still living in NJ and he was living in TX, he called me at dinner.  I had just sat down with my stuffing and green beans.  Horrified, he told me, "Those are just sides!" Yeah, I know. But that's what I like so that's what I made.  Needless to say, since moving to TX I've only had "just the sides" for dinner on nights he didn't make it home.

He also does this weird thing with family.  Here's my thing about family.  As I mention in my About Me section, I come from two pretty dysfunctional extended families.  To me family isn't defined by the blood that runs through your veins but by the relationship you have with these people.  I have a lot of blood-family that I could run into on the street and never know it.  I also have a lot of friends that I consider family--far more of them than blood-family that I consider family.

My husband has some distant relatives that lives in Houston.  He doesn't know them at all. I'm pretty sure that they never met. They certainly weren't at our wedding although I am uncertain if they were even invited.  He's been talking about how we have to go see them because they're family.  Essentially, what I've been hearing is that we have to go meet these strangers.  They've never had a relationship before and I'm sure this wouldn't spark one up.  So, my husband has been telling me that we "are supposed to" go have one terribly awkward night.

I tell him constantly that being an adult means you can do what you want.  We're in this glorious time of our life between living with parents who are telling us what to do and living with children where we have to set good examples.  If I want to have a bowl of ice cream before dinner, Hell, if I want a bowl of ice cream FOR dinner, I can have it. I'm a grown up and I can do what I want.

 Internet photo. Yeah, I would definitely have that for dinner.

I almost titled this post Ice Cream for Dinner but changed my mind because I thought it gave away the ending. But then I realized I think that would make an awesome band name. I CALL IT!